The World is Changing

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

There was an irrational fear when the Czech extracted himself and turned to face him. The silence seemed to taunt him with truths the younger man had not yet spoken.

 

Was it really all over..?

 

Swallow was a bit thick as Bodhan slid up onto the island to sit facing him. It was unusual to see those jade orbs so level with his own, it felt… ominous. He was expecting so much of the next words that would come….so much… except what came.

 

[bodhan] I just didn’t grow up with the same kind of inhibitions everyone else seemed to. I had a sister and parents that loved me no matter what, and I forget sometimes how rare that is.[/bodhan]

 

Breath was slow in his chest as the brow furled faintly over the dark eyes that refused to shy from the younger man's gaze. The Spaniard had not had those things, never learned the more genteel side of relations of any kind. It was something he was acutely aware of at moments like this. Most of his "relationships" had been stereotypes of machismo he had seen in the movies or on the streets as he hid everything he was inside.

 

[bodhan] People took advantage of that, of my… quirkiness… the ease that I moved through the world and didn’t give a care to anything else but my work and my family. [/bodhan]

 

The sound was almost not audible, but the rumble of a protective growl came instinctually to his chest. Without a thought, he would tear the world apart to keep the Czech safe.

 

[bodhan]…..turned to buying me things, buying me things turned to thoughts that I owed them something, or I was owned. That always led to regret, that I had manipulated somehow… turned them “gay” as fucking stupid as that sounds.[/bodhan]

 

The deep brown eyes were incredibly expressive as the raised brow betrayed a dark understanding of the statement despite his own lack of real experience. The one and only man he had ever been with before Bodhan had spent the night with him relishing his touch and crying out pleasure, but the morning light had him screaming disgusting epithets. The nod was faint but acknowledged he understood.

 

Gaze followed the tap on the tooth. The Spaniard was aware it was a cap, not much escaped his inspection when it came to the Czech, every inch, every childhood scar, every dent of musculature was known well by the vampire. But the revelation of how Bodhan had come by the cap again brought up the protective hum in his chest.

 

[bodhan]It’s kneejerk to back off… I’m sorry, and well… when you grow up with a nose in books and a twin that knows everything you’re thinking without saying a word… well, you kind of forget others can’t read your mind.[/bodhan]

 

Lower lip pulled through his teeth a bit fretful as the brow furled. He understood the words but at the same time he still couldn’t shake the feeling that it was him, that he missed things, misread things. He was very socially adept in a bar in public, flirting with women and even men in the interest of keeping peace in his bar. But taken beyond innocuous bar flirting, taken to some kind of one on one direct contact, he was very self conscious that he was socially lacking.

 

Dark eyes watched the sandwich once more become the Czech's victim, approval in the expression as the younger man had not been eating enough lately, or at least not healthy.

 

[bodhan]….I can’t lie either, it has been in the back of my mind that this was a plan all along…..that you finding me at my cabin wasn’t an accident. I knew I was being watched, just not by who. If not you, then who else? ….I always assumed it was you or them…[/bodhan]

 

The dark pupils had flushed and shrunk again, expression fought hard to hide the stun he had just felt. Of all the horrible scenarios he had considered, that Bodhan might think his entire relationship with him was a "plan" was agonizing… lungs burned as he forgot to breathe. That his sister indirectly must have approved did little to settle the panic that fluttered the normally steady heart.

 

[bodhan]I don’t live my life with doubts. Us humans, we’re not here for very long to fuck around with doubts. [/bodhan]

 

Dark eyes watched the Czech become attentive of his pie once more. He was trying to sort through it all. The puzzled expression like a puppy trying to figure out what the hell his master wants when he is being yelled and pointed at. Hips leaned back against the counter across from the younger man. Close and yet so far away. Hands set on the counter to the side of both his hips as he stared at the floor, foot pushing at an uncooked curled noodle someone must have dropped earlier in the day. Furled expression was clearly trying to work something out.

 

If Bodhan did not live with doubts, but he doubted the vampire wasn’t "faking" their relationship, then was he planning to not "live" with the Spaniard any longer? Right hand lifted to rub over the puzzled expression before the breath pulled deep into his chest to cleanse out the fear that was keeping him trapped in his silence. Tongue snaked out to wet the dry lips before the nod slowly came, brow still expressing some confusion.

 

[gabriele]I am not sure there is something I can do if you at heart doubt me… doubt my motives.[/gabriele]

 

Swallow was thick before air pushed from between his lips firmly, clearly trying to put the words together. His normally suave machismo was lacking as the puppy wandered a bit lost.

 

[gabriele]….best I can do is say our paths crossing was not planned. You were in the wrong place at the….wrong?...right?...time.[/gabriele]

 

The Spaniard was struggling. Wondering if their story started with the Czech seeing himself unlucky while the Spaniard had felt himself so lucky for the encounter. Lips were dampened once more. Shrug was a bit sheepish.

 

[gabriele]…even once you were at my place, I didn’t have a clue who you were till… months later really. I mean I knew you were really smart, beyond what I can….[/gabriele]

 

…"understand". The word was left unsaid as he shook his head a bit. This wasn’t about his own inadequacies.

 

[gabriele]… but I had no clue what it was you really did in the world before, or that you would be seen as "important" by so many in this broken world.[/gabriele]

 

Hand scratched at the curls that were getting too long at the back of his neck, frown aging the dark eyes.

 

[gabriele]I brought you here with no one knowing who you were… I hadn't told them.[/gabriele]

 

It was a small fact that the Spaniard might get shit for later. He was sure to be questioned about why he had not been more "forthcoming" in who his charge was. Silence lingered as his hand returned to rest on the counter beside his hip, the dropped chin causing the dark eyes to timidly look up through the thick lashes at the Czech from across the short distance between counter and island.

 

[gabriele]…do you think……..[/gabriele]

 

Air huffed in and then out again as he clearly was hesitant to ask the question. Lips pursing before kicking his own ass to grow a pair of balls.

 

[gabriele]… do you think you could ever get to the point where you don’t doubt my intent?…..something….anything I can do to help you….[/gabriele]

 

Huffed breath came again as emotions that the big Spaniard showed no one, were worn on his sleeve with the Czech.

 

[gabriele]…is there anything I can do to help you see that for me… its never been about anything more than just…. you…. not what you can do.... but just about... you.[/gabriele]

 

The shy gaze flicked up to the younger man, hope and fear glistening in the sheen that was never there.

[Bo Salvatierra]

Gabe got it, finally… maybe.  He’d refused so many of the Spaniard’s things over their time together.  In his mind it was practical refusal, things he didn’t really need or want, only thinking about his side of the fence and not whether it would cross Gabe’s mind that the Czech didn’t trust or value his attempts at helping him.  He was so simple, yet incredibly complex.  He enjoyed luxuries, but had no need for them anymore…  the ginger just simply, had no want for anything further than what he had.  It was a weird concept when everyone in the world seemed to be viciously trying to claw its way back into power.  Him?  Of course he needed things to survive, but a tattered knee on a pair of comfortable jeans was perfectly acceptable in his eyes.  Why did he need a new pair?

 

He was trying to make that puzzled puppy expression disappear, and was having a hard time coming to terms that he couldn’t. What else did Gabe want from him?  Sigh was soft as the vampire increased the distance between them.  That was not a good sign.  The heels of his shoes began to bump softly on the cabinet doors of the island as they absently swung back and forth.

"I am not sure there is something I can do if you at heart doubt me… doubt my motives."
 

[bodhan]…I still wouldn’t be sitting here if I doubted you.[/bodhan]  fork pushed hapless pieces of pie around in the tin distractedly.  There, he’d said it, finally able to part the curtains and figure out why he’d been so aggressively pissed in the basement from hell.   THEY had made him doubt.  Their actions, their attitudes.  THEY had made him feel like a fool for not knowing who Gabe was and being so protective of him when he didn’t need the Czech to lift a finger.  Ever.

"…even once you were at my place, I didn’t have a clue who you were till… months later really. I mean I knew you were really smart, beyond what I can…."

Eyes flicked up at him.  He’d felt that for a while, that the Spaniard thought he was intellectually inadequate next to him.  He remembered, distinctly, that first night he was avoiding death.  Gabe had kept pace with him word for word.  The Czech had met scientists that couldn’t keep up with his logic, but for someone that seemed so self-conscious about his education, or lack thereof Gabe could have stood next to him in a lab… of that he had no doubt.

 

[bodhan]Gabe, you’re not stupid.  I know you think you are.  You have more critical thinking skills than most of the degree clad ‘geniuses’ I used to work with.[/bodhan]

"… but I had no clue what it was you really did in the world before, or that you would be seen as "important" by so many in this broken world.  I brought you here with no one knowing who you were… I hadn't told them."

Smile was faint.  Maybe he did have some kind of way to protect him, just by being himself.  Would Hyun have taken Gabe’s side if not for recognizing who he was?

"…do you think…….. do you think you could ever get to the point where you don’t doubt my intent?…..something….anything I can do to help you…." [bodhan]Gabe, I don’t…[/bodhan]  "…is there anything I can do to help you see that for me… its never been about anything more than just…. you…. not what you can do.... but just about... you."
 

[bodhan]Gabriele, I don’t doubt you.  If I did, I wouldn’t still be here.  They just, pissed me off… made me think I was wrong for ever trusting you.[/bodhan]  he set aside the tortured unfinished pie and leaned his forearms on his thighs, fingers lingered together.  It was his turn to watch the lonely noodle on the floor.  [bodhan]I don’t need money, I don’t need to be taken care of.  I just need you to not hide things from me that aren’t related to this.[/bodhan]  he gestured around the Sheut castle of doom.  He stopped himself.  He did need help, just was not willing to ask for it for the same reason as owing someone.  Gabriele wasn’t just a “someone” though.  Pale eyes looked up at him.  [bodhan]I need you not to doubt me either because I don’t want a diamond watch or a new suit.  If something is wrong I will tell you.  If you think something is wrong, you need to ask.[/bodhan]

 

Great, he’d laid it out… now it was his turn to make good on his word.  There were a few things they had to discuss, he just wasn’t sure this was the greatest timing.  Sigh was long.

 

[bodhan]...and yes, I was serious.  I take discussions over pie very seriously.[/bodhan]

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

[bodhan] …I still wouldn’t be sitting here if I doubted you.[/bodhan]

 

Lower lip pulled through his teeth. It was difficult to marry that statement with the revelation that the Czech had second guessed his motives. What stopped him from continuing to do so.

 

[bodhan]Gabe, you're not stupid.[/bodhan]

 

The puppy expression had resurfaced, in a corner staring at the floor trying to decipher what the hell "stay" meant. He had to get his point across. He needed the younger man to know it was never about "using" him for anything. The back and forth of doubt and no doubt batted between them until finally the older man had fallen silent.

 

[bodhan]They just, pissed me off…made me think I was wrong for ever trusting you.[/bodhan]

 

This place. He had worried all along about the impact of this place. It was a blessing and a curse. There was much to be proud of in what Sheut did, but it was always shadowed in the cloak and dagger games that the Spaniard had no real appetite for.

 

[bodhan]….I just need you to not hide things from me that aren't related to this.[/bodhan]

 

Dark eyes lifted to glance around the kitchen before realizing the Czech too was accusing the Nation for the distance now felt.

 

[bodhan]….. I don’t want a diamond watch or a new suit. If something is wrong I will tell you. If you think something is wrong, you need to ask.[/bodhan]

 

Expression puckered a bit.

 

[gabriele]…I never offered you a diamond watch.[/gabriele]

 

There was a faint hint of smile on his lips. He never tried to lavish gifts on the Czech, he knew him well enough to know it was not what he wanted, but basic necessities? He couldn’t help himself there. A shoulder lifted slightly, a faint puzzlement down on his brow.

 

[gabriele]…you just sometimes look at me like….. like I am trying to put a collar on you and….and the truth is so far from it.[/gabriele]

 

[bodhan]...and yes, I was serious. I take discussions over pie very seriously.[/bodhan]

 

Blink was soft, serious about? Breath hitched up into his throat as he let it sink in that what he wanted… was what Bodhan wanted in return.. to belong truly and utterly to eachother. Married. His "family" growing up would have belittled him for the very thought. He had grown up taught it was a ball and chain for the weak; yet he wanted it more than he could ever put in words.

 

Hips pushed gently off the counter, hands still on the edge as his lips parted only to pop closed again, blinking as the Minister of Asia walked calmly into their privacy and around the large butcher block island. Her eyes cast to the butchered tin of pie before looking up and frowning at the Czech. Her finger ran along the inside edge of the tin to swipe straggling rhubarb before popping it between her lips.

 

[npc]You owe me a rhubarb, scientist.[/npc]

 

There was humor in the almond shaped eyes before she turned and smacked the Spaniard on the back of his head, managing to not look petite as she faintly lifted on her toes to do it.

 

[npc]…move. You are blocking the glasses.[/npc]

 

The impact made him cringe like a kid cowering before his mother's annoyance. He shimmied over, brow lifted as she captured a glass from the cabinet.

 

[npc]Don’t mind me. Just wanted to get a drink before you two started screwing eachother's brains out on the island countertop.[/npc]

 

The choked cough was a bit wide eyed from the Spaniard as she opened the fridge to get the bottle of juice. There was a twinkle of tease in the normally aloof Asian expression.

 

[npc] Jīngyàn... . Shíxiàng yě bù hǎoyìsi. Nǐ zhēn de yīzhí duì tā hǎo kēxuéjiā[/npc]

(Amazing…. the stone statue can be embarrassed. You really have been good for him scientist.)

 

The Spaniard's expression frowned a bit before a brow lifted to look at the younger man, the language completely foreign to him. She set the juice bottle beside the Czech, waiving a hand slightly at it and him.

 

[npc]..put that away before you make a mess.[/npc]

 

The wink was playful to the younger man before pausing on her way out to look at the Spaniard, grin lifting one side of the normally neutral lips.

 

[npc]Being in love suits you, executioner.[/npc]

 

Cheeks flushed a healthy crimson that touched even the dark ears. As soft brown orbs flicked to the Minister and then to the Czech a soft and timid smile touched at the corner of his lips.

 

[gabriele]…thanks.[/gabriele]

 

The world might as well have fallen off its axis as the Spaniard effectively trumpeted his feelings. Not one to share publically much of anything in his life, the soft acceptance of her words also confirmed them as an absolute truth.

 

As she exited the kitchen the quirk of a smile was there, the soft earthen orbs looking from his head's lowered position through the thick lashes at the Czech as a little shrug lifted his shoulders that said again the words were true.

 

There was a shy lick of his lips before he pushed away from the counter that had started to look as though it were holding him up. The distance had seemed so far and yet a single step eroded it entirely as hands hesitated only a moment before resting on the Czech's knees, thumbs softly rubbing the side of the joints. Head lowered to rest his forehead against the younger man's. Breath was coming in slow and calm rhythm as his head rocked gently back and forth before breaking contact to press his lips instead to the warmth of the Czech's brow.

 

[gabriele]I was serious too. You own me already, utterly and completely.[/gabriele]

 

Head shook gently as the hands gently squeezed his knees.

 

[gabriele]…a ring….a ceremony….the words…. they might make it formal…[/gabriele]

 

Again lips pressed to his forehead, held there as he relished the warmth before softly finishing.

 

[gabriele]…..but I have already pledged my "I do"s.[/gabriele]

 

Throat cleared softly as the eyes searched for the jade.

 

[gabriele]…so it is not a question of "if"….. but simply "when" would you like to.[/gabriele]

[Bo Salvatierra]

"…I never offered you a diamond watch."

The look was a bit patronizing, if he would have asked for one, he would have gotten one and the Spaniard knew it.

"…you just sometimes look at me like….. like I am trying to put a collar on you and….and the truth is so far from it."
 

It made him pause.  He was independent, he had to become that way or he would have gone completely insane.  Maree, and he were… symbiotic, so much so that the absence of her presence in his life had nearly killed him.  It was something he’d never told the man, and wasn’t sure he could, or should now.   Hands rubbed together slightly, massaging the poor digits that had calluses from holding a pencil for hours on end.

 

[bodhan]I don’t think I could ever explain what it’s like to truly not be alone at any moment of your life, and then have that ripped from you so quickly,[/bodhan]  he paused at the thought.  [bodhan]I had to learn to live on my own, and it almost killed me.  I’m better for it, but I crave the independence now.  It’s not necessary to take care of me, I don’t need a keeper.  I need someone that understands I don’t need to be amused, or entertained… but I do need help with something.[/bodhan]

 

He didn’t get to finish his thought, thwarted again.  Light gaze cast to the minister as she wandered in, words suddenly silent. He’d not left her outside in the most cordial of circumstances and had been quite abrupt.  Most likely she understood, but you never knew in this zoo.

•npc• "You owe me a rhubarb, scientist."

[bodhan]…fight you for it..[/bodhan]  chuckle was dark as he continued to rub the ache out of his hands, the curt smile sly in her direction as his feet stopped their swing.  Brow cocked slightly at her biffing Gabe in the back of the head, dimples pressing into his cheeks as he watched his toes.

•npc• "…move. You are blocking the glasses.  Don’t mind me. Just wanted to get a drink before you two started screwing eachother's brains out on the island countertop."

 

[bodhan]That comes later.[/bodhan]

 

Glance was cast at the Spaniard’s reaction. He’d always been the prude in public.

 

•npc• " Jīngyàn... . Shíxiàng yě bù hǎoyìsi. Nǐ zhēn de yīzhí duì tā hǎo kēxuéjiā"
(Amazing…. the stone statue can be embarrassed. You really have been good for him scientist.)

 

[bodhan]…you should see him blush..[/bodhan] eyes were back on his polished shoes, the words very consonant and suggestive as he held the last word a bit long, in English of course to antagonize the man and keep him guessing as to just what she had said.... in a good way of course.

 

•npc• "..put that away before you make a mess."

He hopped down off the counter to return it to the fridge, seriously fighting the need to chug straight from the carton.  It was so much better that way.

•npc• "Being in love suits you, executioner."

The curt smile was to himself as he closed the fridge door and regained his perch.

"…thanks."

Blink was slow after her as she disappeared and Gabe decreased their proximity, wanting to continue where he had left off, but still unable to as the cool forehead rested against his.  The now tan flesh that was still slightly sensitive from healed burn felt nice against the Spaniard’s cool skin.  Gingers should never be tan, it was an abomination… as well as hurt like hell after the burn.  He listened quietly, lashes slightly parted to stare at his hands still between his knees, looking up when the man cleared his throat. There were so many things he didn’t yet know about.  They had a long time to sort through them all he supposed.  He wasn’t having doubts, he just…still felt like he hadn’t completely said his peace, and it seemed like Gabe needed more pomp and circumstance than the Czech ever wanted.

"…so it is not a question of "if"….. but simply "when" would you like to."

 

He shrugged slightly, [bodhan]… it’s not really a matter of when either… don’t have anything to give you and could never afford it, and Mar could never come, so… not sure what we’re waiting for.[/bodhan]

 

He was suddenly very melancholy.  Always so full of sass, the sheer reality of where his life had gone was a bit humbling.  Like it or not, he still wasn’t free, and was as collared as he’d been when he was working for companies that were using him for something else entirely right under his nose.  But, he could make his own choices now, couldn’t have the mansion in the mountains at home like he may have dreamt about as a child, but he could make his own choices… which most now couldn’t say for themselves.

 

[bodhan]…definitely not a romantic, you know that.  Temper… reckless, never eat or sleep when I should….[/bodhan] the list could go on and on, he would be a horrible spouse.

 

It was his turn to be insecure, feet swinging again slightly and returning to watching his fingers, for some reason trying to figure out why the man was so infatuated with him.  He drank from cartons, left paper everywhere and went out without leaving a note.  Even though he’d said he would tell him if there was ever anything wrong, he was mulling over issues in his head he’d not yet brought up.

 

[bodhan]…am human,[/bodhan]  there it was again.  Why would Gabe every want to be with someone he knew wouldn’t be with him very long?  He played with the button on his rolled up sleeve cuff.  The light green looked up through his brows at him.  [bodhan]If that’s okay with you… then why not right now?[/bodhan]

 

Sigh was long as he pinched between his eyes, rubbing his eyelids with soft fingertips.  He was serious, he was always serious about his commitments, but the conversation had kept picking at a problem until it was unbearable.  He was human.  He'd just spent an entire diatribe on how he didn't need to be taken care of... it was one of the things that the Spaniard probably picked up on as the Czech being distant.  Thus far it had been impossible to reconcile this truth.  He was mortal, and Gabe was not.

 

Throat cleared quietly.

 

[bodhan]Actually...  Gabriele.  I do need something from you.[/bodhan]

 

Pause was a lot longer than he'd wanted it to be, trying to reconcile that there was something beyond his control that he couldn't get his hands on.  The comment about him being human, was the root of the problem, a surface concern for a deeper fear.  He didn't want to be seen as weak, but he was.  He was only human, and as a human would there be a point when the man would no longer want to 'take care' of him?

 

[bodhan]Just... been thinking a lot lately, not getting any younger.  I haven’t asked because I didn’t want to be a burden.[/bodhan]  It was sort of the truth.  He didn't want to seem weak.  He picked up an apple and started crunching on it to divert the discomfort of the reality and the fact he didn't want to ask.  [bodhan]Before the world went to hell I was scheduled to have eye surgery.  Wasn’t a huge issue then... but was told they would deteriorate faster than an average person.  Deal fell through with a hospital around the time I met you, I had to tell them who I was for them to trust my work enough to front the money.  I backed off, felt wrong.  Didn't want to wake up in a concrete cell for some overlord forcing me to make chemical weapons.[/bodhan]

 

Cheek continued to chew like a chipmunk.

 

[bodhan]I don't think I can wait much longer without it being permanent.  I know what's wrong, I just have to find someone that can do the surgery, not many can,[/bodhan]  he swallowed hard, the damn noodle on the floor catching his attention again.  It was the partial truth, Gabe didn't have to know how bad it was.  [bodhan]...and I can't pay for it.[/bodhan]

 

Apple was fiddled with, fingers reaching up to rub lashes that were a bit damp before hopping off the counter to snatch the pie tin and find a trash to take care of it. His chest hurt, so tight.  It was so hard to ask for help, and a bruise to a staunch shell of pride.  [bodhan]I can work it off, balance your books when they need it.[/bodhan]  He finished the apple and threw it in the trash, reaching for a glass to fill with water and force down the lump in his throat that he was trying like hell not to express.  Leaning on the counter, he finished it and clinked it softly next to him, something at the far side of the room incredibly interesting for a moment before he looked back to the Spaniard.

 

[bodhan]It's not good.  Sorry I didn't tell you, I was just... trying to take care of it myself.[/bodhan]

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

[bodhan]…… I need someone that understands I don’t need to be amused, or entertained… but I do need help with something.[/bodhan]

 

There was a bit of a puzzlement on the darkened expression. He didn’t feel like he was trying to amuse or entertain the Czech. All he wanted to do was help him be happy. But what really made him pause was the potential request for help. That was beyond rare for the younger man. Waiting with bated breath it was all foiled by the arrival of the Minister of Asia who then planted a sex joke at their expense that nearly choked the Spaniard. He couldn’t be more mortified until….

 

[bodhan]That comes later.[/bodhan]

 

The amber tainted brown orbs widened further as they snapped to Bodhan for seeming to delight in making it worse! Eyes snapped back to her and the strange language before widening even further at the Czech…

 

[bodhan]….you should see him blush..[/bodhan]

 

What the hell had she said?!?

 

The vampire was forced to remain perplexed as she exited and Bodhan made no further comment on it. Changing the subject he let the younger man know he didn’t need a ceremony of any kind to know what he felt, that they could make it official whenever the ginger wanted to.

 

[bodhan]… it’s not really a matter of when either… don’t have anything to give you and could never afford it, and Mar could never come, so… not sure what we’re waiting for.[/bodhan]

 

Wheels were churning. Without any family he had no need for anyone to be there but himself and Bodhan, but it made sense the younger man wanted his twin there. There were benefits to being the Executioner of Sheut.

 

[bodhan] …definitely not a romantic, you know that. Temper… reckless, never eat or sleep when I should….[/bodhan]

 

A rare lick of humor made its way into the Spaniard's expression as he turned and set his hips against the butcher block beside the ginger, arms folding over the barrel chest.

 

[gabriele]….and you drink out of the cartons and put them empty in the fridge, you ignore every word I say when you are absorbed in work and don’t shower for days if I don’t haul your ass away from the work and dump you in it…. you don’t put the cap on the toothpaste, you leave toast crumbs on the counter and you NEVER make the bed.[/gabriele]

 

The Spaniard knew the Czech very well.. quirks and all. The amber glinted orbs flicked to the side to look at the younger man, the light of humor glistening behind them, it was like sighting a unicorn and was reserved completely for the Czech alone.

 

[gabriele]….and if that wasn’t bad enough…. you are stuck with me… who drinks out of a bag otherwise I might rip your throat out one night, who has to disinfect the kitchen after every use otherwise I will think about it incessantly, who comes home from work bloody and then cant tell you what I have been doing, who has panic attacks at the mere thought of flying, who will likely never remember your birthday or an anniversary unless someone reminds me, who always has the urge to organize your papers when you leave them strewn even though doing so would likely drive you insane, who doesn’t even have a first grade education and can never watch a sunrise with you.[/gabriele]

 

Hip nudged the Czech's thigh gently. They were both helplessly flawed, but they both already knew as much. Perhaps that was what made this work.

 

[bodhan]…am human.[/bodhan][gabriele]…and I am not immortal.[/gabriele]

 

There it was. Soft words exposing one of many secrets he had gotten permission to disclose to the younger man.

 

[bodhan] If that’s okay with you… then why not right now?[/bodhan]

 

Dark eyes watched the jade a moment before glancing up and around the room, nose crinkling faintly before quietly rejecting the thought.

 

[gabriele]… I would rather not do so under this roof. Call me a romantic but I would like to have a bit of fondness over the memory of pledging my life to yours.[/gabriele]

 

Gentle nudge came again as he shifted his body closer.

 

[gabriele]…. but why don’t we do it here in Scotland? Perhaps at my cabin?[/gabriele]

 

Quiet lingered as they both seemed to be pondering the option. When the Czech broke the silence however, it was with a surprising confession.

 

[bodhan]Actually... Gabriele. I do need something from you.[/bodhan]

 

The Spaniard listened in silence. His eyes. This was not entirely surprising for the vampire. He had noticed in the time they had been together that the younger man was more frequent in his headaches, in his need to rub the eyes and adjust the position of his reading material. He had just never known how to approach it without upsetting the ginger.

 

[bodhan]I can work it off, balance your books when they need it.[/bodhan]

 

There it was again, faint frown darkening the eyes before the quiet sigh murmured in his chest.

 

[bodhan]It's not good. Sorry I didn't tell you, I was just... trying to take care of it myself.[/bodhan]

 

Lips were licked as he pushed from the counter and came in front of the younger man once more. The back of normally weathered fingers gently brushed along the Czech's jawline, expression soft before the words broke.

 

[gabriele]…knew it had been getting worse. Just didn’t know how to talk to you about it.[/gabriele]

 

A hand went down to grab the counter on either side of the younger man, leaning forward to ensure he was "trapped" a faint grin playing on his lips.

 

[gabriele]…if we are getting married. You have to accept a wedding gift from me without any complaints. This will be my gift to you.[/gabriele]

 

Sometimes the Spaniard had the very devil in him and it could come out in a small grin that made the exotic features ridiculously handsome.

[Bo Salvatierra]

"….and you drink out of the cartons and put them empty in the fridge, you ignore every word I say when you are absorbed in work and don’t shower for days if I don’t haul your ass away from the work and dump you in it…. you don’t put the cap on the toothpaste, you leave toast crumbs on the counter and you NEVER make the bed."

Features scrunched slightly, almost hurt.

 

[bodhan]I make the bed,[/bodhan] he defended himself against that accusation.  So maybe he did get absorbed in his work, who didn’t?  Gabe had definitely come home covered in some interesting things over the last year, and don’t even get him started on what he saw Jacob having to clean in his car every so often.  [bodhan]Sometimes.  Well, when I know it will stay made and not get messed up again.[/bodhan]

"….and if that wasn’t bad enough…. you are stuck with me… who drinks out of a bag otherwise I might rip your throat out one night, who has to disinfect the kitchen after every use otherwise I will think about it incessantly, who comes home from work bloody and then cant tell you what I have been doing, who has panic attacks at the mere thought of flying, who will likely never remember your birthday or an anniversary unless someone reminds me, who always has the urge to organize your papers when you leave them strewn even though doing so would likely drive you insane, who doesn’t even have a first grade education and can never watch a sunrise with you."

Lips pursed, reaching to rub the back of his neck.

 

"…and I am not immortal."

It should have registered with deeper meaning than it did at that moment, his thoughts were linear, preoccupying with the subject at hand when it came to Gabe.  He was such a complicated subject, sometimes a lot more than what he covered his papers with.

"…. but why don’t we do it here in Scotland? Perhaps at my cabin?"

He thought a moment, nodding finally.  He still had nothing to give the man, and it didn’t seem likely there was a jewelry store anywhere in the vicinity that did special orders on a dime… or for free.  It seemed then only fitting he explain his futile attempt to correct his eyes.  For all his knowledge and skill, it was one of the only things he could not fix on his own.  He needed people he could trust, and it was incredibly difficult in a world where you could trust so few.  What if things went wrong? 

"…knew it had been getting worse. Just didn’t know how to talk to you about it."

[bodhan]Been worse for a while.  Should have had it done years ago, not sure how much they can save.[/bodhan]

 

Pale eyes looked up at him quietly as he was ‘trapped’.

"…if we are getting married. You have to accept a wedding gift from me without any complaints. This will be my gift to you."

A soft smile finally lit the corners of his lips.  It was nice to see the Spaniard truly smile for the first time in too long a time.  He wasn’t sure if he really knew though how difficult it was to be put into this position.  He had nothing, literally nothing but the clothes on his back to give to Gabe.  He felt so much like a squatter sometimes, or a gold digger.  Lost for days in his paperwork that brought in no money anymore, unable to really be in public for fear of what might happen when he was.  After he’d gotten shot, the danger was just too real.  So he stayed out of sight.  Ate his food, slept in his bed, used his electricity. A sponge.

 

The dark eyes were lost as he came to the realization he really had nothing to give in return.  Fingers rubbed the back of his neck.

 

[bodhan]I can start doing your books on a regular basis.  Like, like a job,[/bodhan] frown was light as he found the dark eyes again.  [bodhan]I have nothing to give you.[/bodhan]

 

It was then, the odd realization struck him, searching the dark eyes with a perplexed expression before opening his mouth.

 

[bodhan]Wait what?  You’re not immortal?[/bodhan]

 

That had done it, the gears began to turn into the man’s mind as he stared at Gabe.

 

[bodhan]Explain,[/bodhan] he insisted, under his breath as his eyes flicked around the room to make sure they were alone.  He felt like scooping up the entirety of food laid out on the butcher block and returning to his room, sitting on the floor and noshing as the Spaniard explained everything to him.

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

[bodhan]I make the bed…..sometimes. Well, when I know it will stay made and not get messed up again.[/bodhan]

 

The petulant insistence only got a raised brow and quirk of his lips that said "yea right" before he began the litany of things that were wrong with himself. They were two peas in a pod, both riddled with baggage that made them both dumbfounded that anyone would want them for who they were to begin with.

 

He was a bit surprised when the revelation of his lack of immortality was not reacted to at all. Either it had not registered, or perhaps the younger man did not believe him. He was relieved when it seemed that the Czech was content to not "do it" in the Nation headquarters but rather wait until they were at his cabin. If they were getting married now, it was not going to be under the shadow of the Sheut.

 

Conversation turned to the younger man's less than perfect vision. Truth was the Spaniard was almost happy the man brought it up. He had wanted to bring it up in New York when he had caught him squinting over paperwork for hours on end.

 

[bodhan] Been worse for a while. Should have had it done years ago, not sure how much they can save. [/bodhan]

 

[gabriele].…if we are getting married. You have to accept a wedding gift from me without any complaints. This will be my gift to you. [/gabriele]

 

Dark eyes relished the soft smile that finally cracked the Czech's expression. Fingers reaching up to gently brush at a ginger curl on his forehead.

 

[gabriele]….and let me worry about how much can be saved. Modern medicine in some cases are…. enhanced…from where they were before.[/gabriele]

 

The Sheut Nation had exceptional doctors who were also blessed with healing abilities. The combination was potent and not available to the "general" public.

 

[bodhan] I can start doing your books on a regular basis. Like, like a job….I have nothing to give you. [/bodhan]

 

Leaning forward the dark eyes became a glisten of serious emotion, words soft.

 

[gabriele]….give me yourself, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to repay you for it.[/gabriele]

 

Chin dipped faintly, the amber flecked dark eyes looking a bit sheepishly up though his dark lashes.

 

[gabriele]…though…I could really use someone to do my books.[/gabriele]

 

He had not asked the Czech before out of charity, he had asked because it was a miracle that Shadow stayed afloat as bad as the bookkeeping was. The guy he had hired had been an actual accountant and skimmed money while faking the records. When the Spaniard found out he took care of the immediate "problem" but figuring out what the hell had happened with the books was something outside his expertise.

 

[bodhan] Wait what? You’re not immortal? [/bodhan]

 

Blink came before a faint smile tugged the corner of his lips. So it was that it had not registered. Typical with Bodhan. How often he answered something an hour later when the question registered.

 

[bodhan]Explain..[/bodhan]

 

He watched the suspicious look around to make sure they were alone but even though it seemed so, the vampire knew better. Leaning forward lips lightly grazed the eager expression of the Czech's as the head shook gently, nuzzle near the ear allowing for a soft whisper.

 

[gabriele]…not here. Lets pack a "to go" lunch and go to my room.[/gabriele]

 

With that powerful fingers squeezed a thigh gently and then moved around him to start stacking up the plates of cheese and coldcuts, juice bottle tucked under his arm as he grinned and nodded towards the exit.

 

[gabriele]…grab something. Someone else will clean up.[/gabriele]

[Bo Salvatierra]

"….and let me worry about how much can be saved. Modern medicine in some cases are…. enhanced…from where they were before."

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Gabe… it was he didn’t trust anyone else.  Nobody along the way had given him a reason to.  He tolerated Jacob because Gabriele trusted him, but didn’t go out of his way to get to know the man.  The thought of being unconscious at the whim of someone else that could potentially ruin his eyesight for the rest of his life was daunting, and terrifying.  It brought back all the little doubts that were nagging him in the last hour for no reason other than to make him miserable.  He didn’t like accepting help, it felt like charity.  There was a time he could do everything for himself, and he loathed to think he was no longer capable of doing so.

"….give me yourself, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to repay you for it."

Brows flickered downward, more from the discomfort of allowing someone else to poke and prod at what truly made him able to do his work.  It was the apprehension all over again.  Why hadn’t he gotten anything  done?  Because he had hesitated.

"…though…I could really use someone to do my books."

That cracked a small smile from under the worried façade, [bodhan]I can do that.. not sure you’ll like what I find, but I can turn it around.[/bodhan]

 

Then it hit him, his linear comprehension able to hold onto things for vast amounts of time as he solved the issues and brushed them aside one at a time.  The immortal comment, stuck with him, waiting for the moment it would flicker back to life in his brain, and the reality that it was possible yet not.  The demand for an explanation was deadpan.

"…not here. Lets pack a "to go" lunch and go to my room."

Puckered frown was adamant, hopping down and snatching what he could, of course more unhealthy things… not pleased with the idea that someone else would clean up.  Again with the thought of favors being done for him.  He paused and looked across the table, tempted incessantly to stay a few moments and at least pick up things and make himself useful, succumbing more to the curiosity as Gabe started moving and he caught up.  Earlier steps were retraced, unable to stop himself from sampling another bout of sugar something that he shouldn’t have had.  He knew he was probably going to make himself sick, but food… it was a luxury he did not spend enough time with.  Gabriele was a great cook, but he wasn’t the Betty Crocker type… and bar food?  Well.

 

Stepping inside, he made himself at home on the foot of the bed without a word, expecting to be told- everything.

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

The Czech had started to look too serious but finally there was a light at the end of the proverbial tunnel as the smile cracked the worrying façade.

 

[bodhan]I can do that… not sure you'll like what I find, but I can turn it around.[/bodhan]

 

Lips quirked upward.

 

[gabriele]… I know I won't like it. I know its bad and I suspect its ten times worse than what I know.[/gabriele]

 

Forehead lightly touched the younger mans as he nudged gently leaning forward.

 

[gabriele]… but they really need to get done right or am going to lose my shirt on the club.[/gabriele]

 

As he advised they needed to move the conversation, the barrel chest chuckled softly at the puckered frown he was rewarded with. Large hands scooped up the healthy things, knowing full well that the Czech would be reaching for the sugary ones. Dark eyes flicked over his shoulder as he exited, watching a moment as the younger man seemed to hesitate over the mess they were leaving behind.

 

[gabriele]….dont worry…. they owe me a few…[/gabriele]

 

The words were soft, something sad and haunting in the tone as he turned and headed back upstairs to his room. As Bodhan entered behind him the donut was plucked from the ginger's lips and replaced with a slice of apple even as powerful fingers snapped the deadbolt in place.

 

Moving to the bed he pulled the suitcase out from under it, flopping it open as he rummaged for the black box. It had been something he had procured through Eris. Her little techy mouse could get her hands on some cool stuff and he trusted that Eris wouldn’t fuck him over. Anyone else he might have ended up with a little black box that tracked his every move and recorded everything. Eris, well, he respected her because she was a straight shooter.

 

Switch was flipped on the jammer to ensure their conversation was their own before he set it on the small table he had been drinking at earlier, hand reaching to snap the curtain so he was bathed in the shadow but the sun still streamed on the other side for Bodhan to enjoy. His chambers were supposed to be protected from all surveillance as often the heads of the council came to discuss with the Executioner problems in their territories, but he wasn’t sure he put it even past Ausar to spy on him.

 

Form sank into the chair as he looked at the Czech wondering where the hell to start, he had never been given permission to tell anyone the Nations secrets, let alone the secrets of the vampires. Fingers scratched a bit sheepishly at the curls at the back of his neck before huffing softly.

 

[gabriele]…I got permission to tell you things that to my knowledge, only five…. maybe six other people know.[/gabriele]

 

Lips puckered a bit thoughtfully watching Bodhan eat as he grabbed a slice of cheese from the platter he had set on the table.

 

[gabriele]Vampires….. were not born of the Nevus event. They existed long before.[/gabriele]

 

The slice of cheese was rolled like a joint before he took a bite off one end and continued thoughtfully.

 

[gabriele]…. little truth in every legend, but for the most part the legends were started by vampires themselves, throwing everyone off their scent. The bigger a fiction they were, the less likely anyone would really believe they existed.[/gabriele]

 

Dark eyes suddenly found the piece of cheese remaining in his fingers very interesting, frowning slightly at it as he licked his lips.

 

[gabriele]….vampires predate any legend of them though by….centuries. Our records show they likely emerged sometime around Ramesses II with the construction of the House of Nephthys.[/gabriele]

 

The amber flecked orbs lifted to look at the younger man again.

 

[gabriele]It is suspected there was a previous Nevus event then that spurred their birth.[/gabriele]

 

There were layers and layers to this story that he knew were going to peek that incredible mind of his lover, and he hadnt even gotten to the part about not being immortal yet.

[Bo Salvatierra]

"….dont worry…. they owe me a few…"

Lips quirked, he still didn’t like leaving a mess, favors or not.  He took care of his own- until the curiosity overcame his reason and he grabbed everything he could.  Protest started as his donut was snatched, stifled by the apple that replaced it. Okay, he got the message at least for now.  He ate well, most of the time.  He had to be honest though, things around his middle were definitely a bit softer than when the brute had found him hunkered down in the mountains.  Seemed he was making up for lost meals, he had to get a handle on it.

 

Apple crunching, he set things down, the state of his health let go for the time being as the curiosity took over.  A black box, curious, resisting the urge to pick it up and fiddle with it.  Most likely wasn’t for him, eyes wary on the sun that was displayed for his side of the room.  He liked it, sure… not crazy about it considering recent events.

 

"…I got permission to tell you things that to my knowledge, only five…. maybe six other people know."

Brow quirked a bit, finishing off the slice.  Goodness, food.  He was just starting to get back to normal from his week of packaged crap and who knows what as he dodged cross country.

"Vampires….. were not born of the Nevus event. They existed long before."

Eyes narrowed.  It made sense.  Things just didn’t appear in literature and culture for no reason.  It wasn’t something he’d particularly paid attention to in his career, he didn’t make a habit of chasing myths when there wasn’t scientific proof or trails to follow.  Gabe had been in front of him now for a while.  He hadn’t asked, because he didn’t want the man to feel like a lab rat.

"…. little truth in every legend, but for the most part the legends were started by vampires themselves, throwing everyone off their scent. The bigger a fiction they were, the less likely anyone would really believe they existed."

He nodded, he understood that.  In his many travels, there were a lot of local superstitions that laid blame to the illnesses he was brought in to eradicate.  Most, were bunk.  Lore.  Years and years of storytelling that created legends and false leads.

 

"….vampires predate any legend of them though by….centuries. Our records show they likely emerged sometime around Ramesses II with the construction of the House of Nephthys."

Brain was turning, sinking into a chair in the sun and rubbing his chin thoughtfully. Brain was moving in a million directions.

"It is suspected there was a previous Nevus event then that spurred their birth."

That brought a crinkled furl to his brow. No… no no, that wasn’t possible, not with what he’d figured out in the last few days.  Fingers rifled his short curls forward and backward, lips tightened in s sigh.  Brain was now ticking faster than he could stop it.

 

[bodhan]How is that possible?   …not, not with…[/bodhan] frown was deep, patting for a pencil in his back pocket.   [bodhan]Wait.. wait…[/bodhan] was this the missing link he’d been trying to find?  That meant everything he’d figured out was wrong, and not in a good way.  [bodhan]I need paper.[/bodhan]

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

Bodhan looked good in the sunlight. The ginger curls flamed up as the pale color still tainted in a faint crimson blush and freckles lighting up in a way that artificial light could simply not do justice to. Smile was soft as he watched the food hog drop into the chair by the small end table.

 

[gabriele]It is suspected there was a previous Nevus event then that spurred their birth.[/gabriele]

 

He could see instantly the wheels start spinning at speeds he could not comprehend. The pause in the Czech's expression followed by the frustrated scratch of fingers through curls.

 

Here it came….

 

[bodhan]How is that possible?... not, not with…..wait…wait….I need paper.[/bodhan]

 

Breath was soft in his chest. He was used to this and yet… wasn’t. He had completely lost the Czech and the story wasn’t even half told. It happened all the time. That mind got going and the Spaniard no longer existed. They rarely got through a long conversation anymore.

 

Pushing out of his chair, he turned to the nightstand beside the bed and pulled the drawer open. Pad of paper and pen slid from its grasp as the soft words came even though he knew they wouldn’t be heard, the younger man already existed in his own head as the thoughts and ideas fired in rapid succession.

 

[gabriele]….it's not the whole story.[/gabriele]

 

This was the mind that always left him feeling lacking in his own ability. Turning he moved back to the Ginger and held out the items, hand quickly tarnishing to a deep bronze in the open light of the sun, smile soft and a bit wistful as the set was claimed by the younger man and he withdrew back into the shadows of the room.

 

As scribbling commenced he moved around the stream of light beaming through the window and opened the antique bar cabinet to pour himself a short glass of scotch. Burnished left fingers were flexed a number of times as the right brought the glass came to his lips. Breath was deep in his chest as the dark eyes watched the window and world beyond it, thick lashes partially squinted at the offensive dalliance of "life" beyond the glass.

[Bo Salvatierra]

Brain was ticking…  tick…  tick… it never shut off, never gave him a moment of silence or peace even when he wanted it so desperately.  There were moments when he thought he was going crazy.  Numbers, problems, algorithms that didn’t make sense until he applied situations to them.  When he was living alone, trying to find a reason not to put a gun in his mouth, when he thought there was no more hope of ever finding his sister dead or alive…  the world would never stop chasing him- he worked.  Captive to his own thought.  Free without freedom.  He watched the man looking for a pad of paper for him with a quiet melancholy, odd that their heavy conversation had taken place so flippantly after the intense moments of doubt and misunderstanding.  He’d been so ready to tear apart the world, and now he was eying another donut while the Spaniard gave him his leave to make the room a pile of papers soon to be walked over by a barefoot and muttering scientist.  Ignoring the Spaniard once again.

 

"….it's not the whole story."

 

Paper lingered a moment in his hands before setting it down on the small side table to watch the world outside.  His sister was safe, he was relatively safe, he’d found someone he refused to live without- who was patient and enabling of his eccentric nature- and still he couldn’t step back from the mind that never stopped turning.  Fingers tapped on the pad of paper, the pen that had found itself behind his ear setting on top of it to merely watch Gabe.  He pushed the paper aside.  Shoes were pulled off by the heel with each toe and he got up to climb onto the bed and lay there gently with his head on the pillow. Arms folded behind his neck.

 

[bodhan]Is that what you were arguing about when I left?[/bodhan]  he couldn’t lie, the booming voices from the ‘basement’ before he’d disappeared out the door were somewhat terrifying.  The urge to purge his brain was slowly being replaced by the need to find silence.  Food, safety, not enough sleep in the week prior.  Calm.

 

Safety.

 

Safety for him and his sister, and Gabe.  It was the first time since the world ended where his presence seemed truly relaxed.  A weight was gone that had become exponentially heavier by the year.

 

[bodhan]You don’t have to get in trouble for me,[/bodhan]  lashes lowered, watching him from the comfortable perch that was pulling at his bones.  It didn’t feel like a rat trap any more so much as a means to an end.  [bodhan]I know it seems like I didn’t want to do this, and I was leery… but it needed to happen.  For Maree, for me- for you.  You don’t have to tell me these things because you think it’s repayment for me choosing not to stay in obscurity.[/bodhan]

 

Sigh was long, kneading between his eyes.

 

[bodhan]I need to find a point of silence without constant motion… more dinners with you, maybe…  a hobby?[/bodhan]

 

He wasn’t rebuking all the tidbits that the Spaniard seemed so eager to spill. He just felt like sometimes he was being thrown treats because the man was trying to compete for his attentions with the books, pencils, and papers.

 

[bodhan]I’m going to put away my papers while we’re here, though you'll still have to forgive me if I jot things down every once and a while for later… and find something else to do- like you teaching me how not to get shot, or maybe…  a puppy.[/bodhan]

 

Smile was warm.  The room was warm, indirect sun calming. He had good food in his belly.  Bed was soft. He had set “science-ing” away for the time being and… holy shit he was getting married.

[Gabriele Salvatierra]

Dark eyes were faintly squinted against the exterior light as the glass came to his lips. He wondered how long the Czech would forget he existed this time. It was a fate he had become accustomed to over the last year.

 

Blink was profound as he listened to the younger man remove his shoes instead of starting to scribble his endless notes. Dark eyes flicked after the ginger as he left the paper behind and crawled into bed to lie on his back, arms comfortably supporting his head. Head cocked slightly in question.

 

[bodhan] Is that what you were arguing about when I left?[/bodhan]

 

Tickle of a smile played at his lips, dark eyes soft as he once more danced his way around the streaming sunlight and came to the side of the bed, the dark liquor finished before powerful fingers set the glass on the side table, grip on the rim retained.

 

[gabriele]…something like that.[/gabriele][bodhan]You don’t have to get in trouble for me..[/bodhan][gabriele]…you are worth getting in trouble over.[/gabriele]

 

Grin was almost boyish as he released the glass and sat on the edge of the bed beside the Czech's hip, leaning over the leaner form until his hand lay on the side of his other hop so he could look down at the relaxed ginger.

 

[bodhan] I know it seems like I didn’t want to do this, and I was leery… but it needed to happen. For Maree, for me- for you. You don’t have to tell me these things because you think it’s repayment for me choosing not to stay in obscurity.[/bodhan]

 

Sigh was soft in his chest, the smile a bit lopsided before he reached up and brushed the softly flamed lock from the younger man's forehead.

 

[gabriele]…it's not repayment. Its stuff I think you should know as well as secrets about me that I don’t want to keep anymore…… not from you.[/gabriele]

 

Fingers moved from the mattress to pinch a tease at the side of the younger man's abs.

 

[gabriele]….before I am old and senile and you are pushing me around in my wheelchair while I look for my teeth.[/gabriele]

 

Impish grin pulled lips back to flash descended white canines in a downright devilish expression of humor.

 

[bodhan]….more dinners with you, maybe….a hobby?[/bodhan]

 

[gabriele]….knitting perhaps?[/gabriele]

 

Bodhan was not the only one that seemed finally relaxed, the soft smile teasing.

 

[bodhan]…like you teaching me how not to get shot.[/bodhan][gabriele]…that works too..[/gabriele][bodhan]..or maybe… a puppy.[/bodhan]

 

Grin came easily now, it was rare that he wasn’t looking over his shoulder, here he was only in political danger, not imminent death. That left the Spaniard comfortable in his skin, something Bodhan had been teaching him along the way.

 

[gabriele]…not even got a ring on your finger yet and you are trying to start a family.[/gabriele]

 

Leaning down almost menacingly over the younger man his lips nearly grazed his as he spoke.

 

[gabriele]…next thing you will be wanting me in big rubber gloves doing the dishes after slaving over dinner for you.[/gabriele]